045 | VIDEO

[myresponsibility]

Hey kids, [Peter gives a friendly wave. He's wearing his Spider-Man costume again, and might be sitting on the ceiling of his room. You can see the corner of his desk upside down from where he's sitting.]

My name's Spider-Man, and I wanna make one thing totally clear: you haven't been kidnapped, you're gonna get home soon, and we're gonna do everything we can to make sure you're having an okay time when you're here.

What's your favorite movie?

[Filtered Away from the Chilldarens]

So, who's left? How're we doing with the kitchens and stuff? I might not be ready to go on Iron Chef, but I can make grilled cheese and soup, if we're short staffed.

And seriously, just so we're totally, totally clear: anyone who messes with any of the kids is getting webbed to the ceiling and left there until the flood's over, if you're lucky. Don't try it.

Comments

[whatthewrackspurt]

What's a movie?

[myresponsibility]

It's like a play, except the actors all finished it a long time ago.

Do you know what a photograph is?

[filter]

[fridgetothefire]

Simple is probably the way to go with kids anyway. They'll survive on sandwiches for a while.

Last time most of us were herded in the greenhouse, but Ivy had better control over that space that we do, and I don't really want to trash it.

Movies and big blanket forts in the dining hall might be the way to go.

[filter]

[myresponsibility]

It's like we share a brain!

[filter]

[chaotica]

I like how the both of you think.

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[chaotica]

Good to know.

I have a replicator in my quarters, and it doesn't appear to be running out of power any time soon. It can create food. Children who come in to have ice cream I will do my best to keep occupied until they would also be amenable to a few sandwiches.

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[myresponsibility]

Sounds good to me. What kind of ice cream does it make?

[warisart]

I am here.

What is Iron Chef?

[myresponsibility]

It's a TV show, chefs like, compete to see who's better at cooking.

[flawedgem]

[It's ridiculous, truly, that a full body costume makes her more trusting.

But she remembers the way Batman smiled at her, scant minutes before she arrived.]

Alien.

[private]

[clockworkflower]

Shh, they're all aliens here.

[And then, hurriedly.]

Nice ones, I mean. But it's a rude thing to call someone, Panda says.

[myresponsibility]

That might be a little scary for some of the other kids.

Video

[walkthedarkpath]

Are you a demon man-spider? Or just a man who wants to be a spider?

Video

[myresponsibility]

I'm a guy who got bitten by a genetically engineered spider and got superpowers.

[runslikethewind]

Thank you, sir! [Spider-Man is such and unfortunate name.] I'm glad someone decided to be responsible.

[Unlike Chris. She's totally going to punch him.]

[myresponsibility]

Yeah, well...

"With great power comes great responsibility," as someone told me I'm supposed to say.

[Hilariously, it was Chris who said that. Peter had never heard those words in that order before.]

[clockworkflower]

If you try and make me go home I'm feeding your liver to my dogs, Mister Spider.

[myresponsibility]

No one's going to make you do anything.

[whatthefoxsay]

[It's Spider-Man? It's Spider-Man?!

Kira's eyes go huge with wonder and amazement.]

SPIDER-MAN!!!!!

[myresponsibility]

[Oh my god, Kira, you're too cute.]

Hey. Kira, right?

[bigkanimaoncampus]

Spider-Man's stupid. Batman's WAY cooler.

/jack

[whatthefoxsay]

[Incredulous,]

Don't call Spider-Man stupid! Spider-Man isn't stupid! It's not a contest. Is Batman here? Nooooo. Is Spider-Man here? Yeeeeees.


YOUR FACE IS STUPID, JERKFACE.

Filter

[voluntaryapnea]

Still myself.

Pretty sure I'm going to be playing babysitter to at least two. [He rubs a hand over his face because wow he is not prepared for this. At all.]

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[myresponsibility]

Hey look, if you need a hand, I'm pretty good with kids.

[strangehistorian]

I'm left! I can hunt for the kids. We need to make sure they're all warm in this snow! Humans do like cheese, I think, but they're growing! They need protein. Has anyone seen the kitchen staff?

[myresponsibility]

Ben checked in, and Cambridge has a replicator in his room. We should be okay.

Hopefully.

video;

[notdreaming]

I still have my powers, it seems like. So if you need any help, it doesn't seem to matter how short I am.

[ Which is to say: pretty frickin short. ]

video;

[myresponsibility]

Great! How're you doing?

[broughtapplejuice]

Prove it.

[Comic books are not real, okay. You're probably just some guy in a suit. He is giving the most skeptical look a seven year old can muster.]

[myresponsibility]

Well, I'm sitting on the ceiling.

[He moves the comm around to prove that yes, indeed he is sitting on the ceiling, apparently unsupported by anything but his own body.] And I can do this-

[He drops the comm and catches it with a line of web, which sticks itself to the screen in plain view before he pulls it back up and peels it off.]

And I can lift a car over my head, but since we're short on those around here, you might just need to take my word for it.